Mastering Boundaries for Social Work Success Part 2: Strategies to Set and Clearly Communicate Boundaries

Last article we explored why boundaries are essential for us as Social Work Professionals and how maintaining them is often challenging. Now let’s turn focus to practical strategies to set, communicate, and maintain these crucial boundaries.

Effective boundary-setting isn’t about gate keeping, restricting compassion, or distancing oneself from our clients—it's about creating habits which support emotional resilience, clarity, and respect within our professional (personal too) relationships. In order to accomplish this effectively, we should draw from the great Brené Brown’s authoritative work, Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.

Identifying Our Boundaries Clearly

In order to effectively communicate our boundaries, we must first identify our limits. We should reflect on areas where we feel most stretched or stressed—that may be time related, emotional capacity related, workload related, etc... Brown emphasizes this clarity in her concept of

"Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind." She goes deeper:

“Feeding people half-truths or bullshit to make them feel better (which is almost always about making ourselves feel more comfortable) is unkind.” (Brown, Dare to Lead)

When boundary setting, clarity is kindness—both for ourselves and those around us. We show genuine compassion by honestly and openly communicating our limits rather than allowing ourselves to become frustrated and/or getting resentful.

Reflection:

• What are your current boundary challenges?

• Where do you feel unclear or frustrated in professional interactions?

Setting Boundaries with Clear Communication

Being clear in boundary setting communication is expressing our limits straightforward like, yet compassionately. Brown encourages "clear, respectful, and straightforward communication," especially in challenging conversations.

Here’s a practical framework inspired by Brene’s approach:

• Be Direct: Clearly state your boundary.

• Express Impact: Explain briefly why this boundary is necessary. How it will help.

• Invite Dialogue: Open lanes for mutual understanding and clarification.

Example: If colleagues often approach you outside work hours, clearly express:

“My availability after 5 PM is spotty at best. I tend to put my phone down after business hours and not pick it up again. I gotta do this if I want to be fully present during the workday. If something is urgent, let me know and we’ll address it first thing the next morning.”

Communicating Boundaries Through "Clear is Kind" Scripts

It may sound fake and contrived, but utilizing prepared language can help bigly in boundary conversations. Brown recommends practice and preparedness for these conversations. Here are some of her practical scripts adapted specifically for us as social workers:

• Time Boundary:

“To provide the best care for my clients and myself, I need to keep my appointments within scheduled hours when at all possible. Let’s work together to find a regular appointment time that fits.”

• Emotional Boundary:

“I truly care about supporting you, and I need to maintain certain emotional limits. Let’s explore ways I can effectively support you while we also keep a healthy balance for both of us.”

• Workload Boundary:

“Taking on additional responsibilities right now would compromise the quality of my work and my health. Let’s discuss priorities or perhaps revisit this once my workload decreases?”

Courageously Navigating Resistance

Expect resistance, especially when boundaries are new. According to Brown, boundary setting requires courage because it demands vulnerability. She states:

“Daring leaders who live into their values are never silent about hard things.” (Brown, Dare to Lead)

Addressing resistance requires clear yet compassionate reaffirmation of your boundaries:

• Acknowledge discomfort openly:

“I understand this might feel inconvenient initially. It's important for both of our sustainability.”

• Restate your boundary firmly:

“This boundary is necessary for me to continue offering consistent, effective support.”

• Maintain consistency: Be prepared to uphold your boundary firmly and compassionately, even when challenged.

Reinforcing Boundaries Through Continuous Communication

Consistent reinforcement of boundaries is fundamental. Brown notes the importance of continuous communication, stating:

“Clear boundaries, reinforced consistently, build trust.” (Brown, Dare to Lead)

Regularly reaffirm your boundaries through routine communications, meetings, and check-ins. Maintain openness to feedback, demonstrating your willingness to engage empathetically without compromising essential limits.

Practical Exercises

To actively apply these strategies, consider the following reflections and exercises:

• Identify One Key Boundary:Reflect and clearly define one professional boundary you need to establish or reinforce this week.

• Draft Your Boundary Script:Write a clear, compassionate boundary statement using Brown’s "clear is kind" framework.

  
  

Looking Ahead

By clearly setting and communicating our boundaries, we nurture healthier interactions, reduce stress, and enhance our professional sustainability reducing the possibility of compassion fatigue. We need to embrace Brown’s philosophy that clear, direct communication is both kind and courageous. Our ability to clearly articulate our boundaries sets the foundation for healthier, more effective relationships with clients and colleagues.

Next week we’ll explore strategies for defending our boundaries effectively and handling situations where our boundaries are challenged or violated.