Applying Motivational Interviewing Techniques to Self-Talk

As Social Worker Professionals we use Motivational Interviewing (MI)—a collaborative conversation style—to support our clients make positive, lasting behavior change. Yet, few of us apply these powerful communication techniques to our own internal dialogue. This is a missed opportunity. An opportunity which can profoundly impact our personal well-being and resilience. By incorporating MI's core components of Open-ended questions, Affirmations, Reflective listening, and Summarizing (OARS) into our self-dialogue, we will significantly enhance our self-care, reduce emotional fatigue, and foster self-awareness

The Power of Self-Dialogue

Word are energy and the cast spells, that's why it's called spelling. Change the way you speak about yourself, and you can change your life. - Bruce Lee

Your internal dialogue shapes your emotional resilience and professional well-being. Negative self-talk after challenging client interactions or professional setbacks can erode our confidence, increase stress, and fuel burnout. Typical negative thoughts, “Why did I handle that so poorly?” or “I really suck at these tough situations.” To counteract this, developing structured, compassionate self-dialogue practices is essential.

OARS for Self-Talk

Motivational Interviewing revolves around 4 powerful conversational skills

1) Open-ended questions.

2) Affirmations

3) Reflective listening

4) Summarizing

Open-Ended Questions: Shifting Criticism to Curiosity

Instead of berating yourself with closed-ended criticisms, use open-ended questions to foster curiosity and growth:

• Instead of, "Why do I always fail at this?" try, "What valuable lesson can I take away from this situation?"

Take a moment to write three open-ended questions to use when overwhelmed, stressed, or self-critical.

Affirmations: Building Resilience and Self-Efficacy

Affirmations are positive statements that reinforce our inherent strengths and abilities. Transform negative self-talk into affirming, empowering statements:

Replace, "Man, I really dropped the ball today," with, "Today was a challenge. But I’m tougher for it, and learned how to better manage myself next time."

Write daily affirmations focused on personal strengths and growth areas, repeating them regularly to solidify positive internal dialogue. A mantra if you will.

Reflective Listening: Cultivating Emotional Awareness

Reflective listening inwardly means acknowledging our emotions without judgment. This technique allows us space for compassionate understanding:

Instead of ignoring our redlining emotional overwhelm, we should acknowledge it: "I'm having a hard time keeping up right now. Things are moving fast. Makes sense though, my workload has increased with several difficult clients and number of responsibilities."

Engage regularly in a brief, reflective listening session, calmly identifying and acknowledging your emotional state and needs. Then attack your responsibilities one at a time. “How do you eat an elephant?”

Summarizing: Creating Clarity from Complexity

Summarizing internal dialogues helps us gain clarity, identify repeating patterns, and solidify insights from our experiences:

At the end of a difficult day, summarize constructively: "Today was stressful, yet I managed to handle each challenge. I learned valuable strategies and reinforced my resilience."

Set time aside weekly to journal and summarize your experiences, noting growth, accomplishments, and opportunities taken advantage of.

Integrating Self-Dialogue with Daily Self-Care / Stacking the loose change in our head

Inserting MI-based self-dialogue into our daily self-care routines amplifies the benefits and builds habits:

Morning Ritual: Use affirmations and open-ended questions to set positive daily intentions. For example, "Today is a good day to have a good day and focus on what I can control."

Evening Ritual: Reflectively listen and summarize your daily experiences to process emotions constructively, identify growth opportunities, and compound emotional clarity.

These practices seamlessly integrate with our other self-care techniques like mindfulness meditation, journaling, and exercise, deepening their emotional benefits and enhancing our overall wellness.

Transforming Challenges into Opportunities for Growth

Reframing internal dialogue using MI transforms perceived setbacks into powerful growth opportunities we can harness for good. Rather than viewing struggles as failures, as Social Work Professionals, we can view them as valuable learning experiences. When we do, we reduce compassion fatigue, we build resilience, and support sustainable professional growth. We get better. Our agencies get better. Our clients have better outcomes.

Commit to practicing one MI self-dialogue technique daily for a week and notice how your emotional resilience, well-being, and professional outlook improve as a result.